I'm a Much Better Parent With God

There are certain things I really don't know about being a parent. I think I know less than I think I really do. BUT, I always hope that I can be the best parent I can be, flaws and all.

My little girl has a way of challenging everything that I once "thought" I would say or do as a mother. It is thrilling to get to know her a little more everyday. To understand how she was beautifully and fearfully made, and to encourage her spirit to be the person God intended her to be. She's only two at this point, and most of the time I'm really finding out how she was fearfully made.... can I get an Amen!? Some days, I truly don't know how I can carry on and then something happens.. I admit to myself and to God that I am NOT, to contrary believe (I think of just myself),  the ruler of the universe. And when I ask humbly for help - because I know that without the help of the Holy Spirit I suck at being a parent - I see the miracle that God gives me that day... patience, forgiveness and unconditional love to my little girl.  Now ask me if I do this everyday... NOPE! I get so caught up in "life" that some days I don't back down and I think I alone can do it all. Those are the days that I find it hard not to yell, those are the days that I cry of frustration, those are the days that I walk into my little girls room and see she has taken her diaper off and poo is smeared ALL over herself, the crib and her favorite stuffed animal. Cool. I am not trying to say that when I ask for God's help in directing me as a mommy everything goes right. However, my attitude is so different that I bring on a different, more positive energy into the day that even if I'm thrown for a loop, I have the Holy Spirit backing me up and I can feel a difference. There is a difference. The tough part is remembering and putting into action my faith in God as a parent. He can help me be the mother he intended me to be. Will I fail miserable time and time again? Yes, but there is a wonderful thing that will happen when my daughter sees my vulnerability as a mother. She will relax in herself and she will know that even mommy needs God's help. And she will see a difference when I trust in the Lord. Example is by far more impressive to a little heart than empty words and expectations.

Let God lead you today to be the parent He created you to be. You will never be perfect, but you will have an awesome opportunity to transmit a seed onto your children that will feed a hunger for God.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

If You've Lost A Parent For Any Reason...

I know how much you've been hurt. Nothing on this earth can ever replace the loss of a father or a mother. Be it whatever circumstance- your mother not being able to be there for you because she battles with depression or your father unable to be there for you because his best friend used to be the bottle of vodka you so desperately poured down the drain to prevent him from taking another drink. Or simply because death came so unexpectedly and took one of your parents or both, or any other horrible circumstances...The bond that one forms with a parent is something that is out of this world. A bond so ferocious that if broken can leave you feeling lost, void, and looking for something in this life, in this world, to fill what you crave the most-guidance to the one and only who can be the ultimate and perfect FATHER.  I can say that God provided me with the perfect parents to make me turn to Him. In many ways both my mother and my father have let me down and I've had to turn to God for fulfillment. In many ways the good in both of my parents has given me hope that one person can not be judged solely on the wrong they've done. I've seen God work in both of my parents now as an adult and can happily say that he has saved my father from a massive alcohol addiction and is currently working on my beautiful mother on her battle with anxiety and depression.


Trying to be positive has helped me in my walk with God. However, it's been through prayer that God has used my brokenness and vulnerability. I've let God get in my soul to show me why I've done some of the dumbest things in my life. Forgiving and letting go of all the anger, sadness and resentment has provided me with so much healing and peace. It has not been easy, but I would not have it any other way, it has provided me with a close and intimate relationship with God that I never would of had otherwise.  The interesting thing is that everything that I think has been a mistake in my life reverts back to wanting my parent's approval and love. It goes back to that bond. God knows who our parents are going to be and he knows what children He is going to entrust onto us. He knows that we are at some point going to be let down or be the ones to let someone down. Even the most wonderful of parents can let their children down from time to time. Or they can be taken away from this life too soon (in this case, don't regret the time you didn't have with them and run through a list of all the things you could'a, would'a, should'a done. Instead, be grateful for the time you DID have and those precious moments that were a gift of God).

The world is going to let us down! I will say it again, the world and the people in it, even the ones we love the most, are going to let us down. That is why God has to be the answer to our search. The void we so eagerly want to fill with sex, shoes and cigarettes will only and forever be satiated with a close relationship with our creator, God Almighty.

I hope that if you are reading this and you find yourself in my shoes you can be able to ask God for your own healing. I pray this super crazy-sauce because I've never felt more full and joyful in my life than at this time. This is where the healing begins...

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

-Libier

Forgiveness

     

  My birthday is in thirty something days, woohooo!!  Every time one of those rolls around I am forced to think about my life and make sure it's on the right track. As I was thinking of everything that I've done in the past ALMOST 28 years of my life, I couldn't help but remember my childhood. There's a specific point in those wee years that always makes me super-dee-duperly confused because on one hand I get sad about it and on the other it makes me proud of my family and myself. But more importantly, it makes me realize the importance of attitude,love and family. So here it is, I'm going to tell you something that most people don't know about me. When I lived in Mexico and was the very mature age of 6, I had to get a job bagging groceries at the local supermarket so my mom and I could make ends meet. There I said it, I had a job when I was 6! See weird, I'm super proud to say that I was a total working machine at that young age. However, in the same token if I think about it for what it REALLY was and put my daughter in place of me... waterworks!!! I get so sad to think that my mom had to tell me, "Mija, it's time to get a job. You can't watch the smurfs when you get home from school anymore. It's time to grow up." (Granted this is not at all what she said, she didn't even speak English then but that's what I'm making up for the sake of the story. Okay? Okay!)

     Whenever I think back about this time in my life, I seriously don't ever remember any sadness from being poor or bleakness from HAVING to have a job at 6 years of age. In place of any negative feeling, there is a sense of pride and joy that I was able to do all those things and triumph in the end. I would NEVER be the person I am today if it had not been for all of the crummy circumstances in my life. I probably would not be as understanding and resilient as I find myself now. So I am thankful for all of those opportunities that made me a stronger person. And the more and more I think about why it was almost "fun" for me to have a job so young, I realize that it was my mothers AMAZING attitude that helped me not be sad as a child. She has an amazing quality about her that makes her a fighter no matter what life throws her way. At that time she probably had such a  heavy-heart to have to make her little girl go to work. She didn't let on to me that we were in dire need. For me it was as though we had been rich all along. It wasn't until I did have that I understood how much we didn't for a long time.

       My mother had a huge impact on me as a young girl, and then in my teenage years she made some poor choices in her life that have affected me in a lot of ways. For a very long time, I felt so resentful towards her for making me feel like she did. And then God told me to knock it off. When I grasped that my mother is JUST a human being that is trying to make it here on earth as much as the next gal, I knew I could not continue to put her on a pedestal that made her unable to make any mistakes. I had a hard time not seeing my mother as perfect because my whole childhood was happy because of her. She protected me from so much ,gave up and sacrificed even more than I can imagine for my well being. She made it so even in the shittiest of circumstances, I was able to live a loving and some what "normal" childhood (pardon the French, I couldn't find a better word!) She helped me believe in myself. She taught me the power of working hard and being a good, kind person. She taught me that you have to be likable  and funny and to not rely on looks to get you places.  She helped me realize that I really WASN'T the center of the universe like I once had believed, go figure! So you can imagine how difficult it was for me to understand that she's only a human being that has the right to her own mistakes in life ( I saw her more like a cross between Phoenix and Storm, the perfect Super-heroine!)

 There is so much of my mother in me that I am extremely proud to say came from her. Her attitude and love made my childhood one that I remember being filled with joy and happiness. It didn't matter that I had to work at such a young age, because I had my mom to come home to and she was the best mom she could have been to me. In spite of the "bad" choices she's made in her life, God has commanded me to honor my father and mother, He doesn't say, "honor them ONLY if they don't do anything wrong...."  So this is me forgiving my mother of anything she ever did that hurt me in any way. I understand that you are not a super-heroine after all mommy, and that's perfectly okay because you are my MOTHER, and in so many ways that is way cooler!

 Are you holding on to something you should let go of today? Is there someone in your life you're building up to be a superhero rather than a real person that has the right to their own mistakes?  I encourage you to think and pray about it and let it go. Let God be the judge not you. There is an indescribable peace that comes along when we let go and just love people regardless of what they do. I hope you all are having beautiful days! 

Stay blessed and stay saucy! 

Thank you mamacita hermosa.