Working Hard Or Hardly Working

I don't know how much you know me but if you do know me at all you know that I have 101 ideas runing through my head daily about cool things I want to do. Projects I want to dig my teeth into, crafts I want to start, classes I want to teach. If you came up to me on any given day and asked me what "ideas" were jogging down my membraine, I could easlily rattle off at least 2-3 (I'm being a little more realistic here, see?).

With that comes a greater chance that the 2-3 ideas perusing in my mind, will never come to fruition. I really don't know why I do that ( I think I was just made a do'er) but sometimes it's exhausting in my brain! Sometimes I wish I could not have any ideas at all. But then again that wouldn't really be me.

Aaaany waaaay! I've been taking a hard look at the makeup of myself and seeing how I tend to like to do a lot of things, however, I'm not AMAZING at any ONE thing. Not that it's a terrible thing, but when I think of why, the answers always comes to me with "well I don't think I'm working hard enough" at the things I really do love. For example. I love to dance, I wasn't classically trained but I do love it. I can pick up choreography and dance like it's the last thing I'll ever do. BUT I can't say that at ANY given point I really worked extremely hard at getting really really good. I've lacked discipline.

WHY? Well I can't tell you easily that it just comes down to being a tad bit lazy and scared of failing. Because when I do something kind of half-assed, I don't run the risk of failure, or embarrassment, or hurting myself in any way. In other words I have to be willing to go all in and be okay with failing dramatically in order to say, I've worked hard at something. I'm not that kind of person. I don't want to "fall". I like to play it safe and stay within my comfort zone because there I can pretend that I'm this cool person that makes no mistakes right? Ha, even saying that sounds so ridiculous. People are always going to have some opinion about me. People are not always going to agree with me or even like me. So why do I get so hung up on not working really hard and falling really hard in order to get really good at something I love, for the sake of looking stupid in front of someone that probably doesn't even think that in the first place. They are probably just having a lot of gas that day and that's why their face looks weird and to ME it looks as if  they are in disapproval of what I'm doing! Ahhh that was a lot to get off my chest. I don't even know if this blog is making ANY sense AT all. So if you're reading this and a million of question marks are filling your brain, I do apologize but I'm feeling really good and vent-Y right now. And that's not even a word, so there!

I guess all in all, I want to work on not trying to "impress" the gassy man next to me and just live my life and work hard at the things I love to do. In the end, it's hard work that gets the results we are all looking for. You reap what you sow, don't cha know? I want to make a pledge to work on my talents in a way that is pleasing to myself. I also want to work on not being scared of falling, because when we fall it means we're going all out at something we really love. Believe it or not, I came to this conclusion by watching my toddler. She doesn't care what people are thinking of her. To her, the world is only a poke away and she is curious about everything. She doesn't stop when she can't get the cap off the stinkin' toothpaste. She continues on; even if it means sliping from the chair she dragged all the way from the kitchen to get a better view of our sink. After she falls off, she climbs back on the chair and by God she finishes unscrewing that cap! What resilience. Did she ever turn to look at my weird face? NOPE!

 Don't be scared to get back on that horse and gallop right into your dreams.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

-Libier

I Went Clubbing Last Night

One of the things that makes me most excited in this life is dancing. I constantly have dance parties with my toddler. I am NOT going to lie, we get down! We get down so much that she likes to go on the coffee table and dance on top so she can keep sort of eye level with me. We have dance parties almost every day. The other day we danced for thirty minutes! Wowza! I would never think a toddler would want to dance for a whole thirty minutes (now when I say dance, I do mean bouncing up and down with her little legs and just moving her rump, soooometimes she'll throw in a spin or a shoulder move. I know, very fancy)! I do these dance parties because I LOVE to dance. I don't remember the last time I was at a club... wait maybe I do, it was circa 2009, November to be exact. Just a few days before finding out I was growing a tinny little alien looking gummy bear in my belly. Of course once you have a baby you don't think, "Oh today, I think I am going clubbing". Hahaha, that thought never crossed my mind! But deep down inside the passion for dance is there, thus the amazing dance parties with my baby girl.

Last night I went clubbing. Not only does that feel silly to say because I'm almost thirty, but it's even sillier that I went to an over 18 gay club. And not just ANY club. I went to a club that I myself attended, almost every weekend, circa 2004 with some of my favorite friends. The ONLY reason I went yesterday, was to celebrate my nieces birthday. Her and her friends wanted to go out dancing but they are not 21 yet, thus going to this particular place. I was honored that she thought her old lady aunt would be hip enough to go out dancing with all of her friends, so I could not deny the invitation. As I walked into the club, I was filled with thousands of memories of the " ARC company dance days". As I danced my little tush off, I couldn't help but feel so proud of my friends that I once had the honor of sharing the dance floor with. I'm a completely different person now than who I was way back when and to know that those friends have loved me ever since then, gave me chills and warmed my heart.

Same place, different perspective in life. How cool is that. As I dance with these teens/early twenty something people, all I could think of was, I really hope they get to have wonderful memories and wonderful friendships as I have.

In life, we can't ever chose our family (we need to honor them because they are a gift from God in-spite of how irritating they might seem at times). However, we can choose our friends. Our friends are going to love us, encourage us, tell us we're smoking crack when we do something stupid. Our friends help us find ourselves in this big,big world. God places the friends He thinks are going to help us grow and become a better person in life. These are friendships that can last a lifetime if you work hard at it. Even friendships take  work. But worth every effort.

I say today you take the time to tell your friends how much you freakin' love them. Even when they make you mad, your fiends are always going to know who you are, where you've been and what box you've danced on at the CLUB.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!!!