Monday, August 8, 2011

For Better Or For Poop In Your Shorts!

                I'm pretty sure I don't want to be writing this blog right now. And I'm pretty sure this has been a very very embarrassing day. Doug and I went on our long run today and since we didn't wake up early we did it at 3PM and it felt as if it were 139 degrees out side! I was having a really really hard time with my breathing and I  felt nauseous, but I wanted to continue running because I didn't want to make Doug not finish his run, so I pressed on. DISCLAIMER: If you get grossed out easily please stop reading and come back to the next blog, you really don't want to read this if you're easily repulsed. OK for those of you who stuck around, congratulations, you and I will be much closer next time we see each other. Moving on!

               The heat was intense and I had to stop running for a second to catch my breath and for a split second I thought, "Oh I think I have to fart, I'll do it now that no one but my baby and husband are around." I pushed with all my might and I definitely felt poop in my shorts! I could not believe I had just pooped my shorts. What the what!? So many thoughts went through my head! Oh Lord do I just hide this from  Doug and get home as fast as possible to get cleaned up? Well, we had about a mile and a half left on our run, I was NOT going to run with poop on myself, and I wasn't going to not say anything and then have Doug smell something rather unpleasant OR for that matter SEE something on my shorts. Eeeeeewwwwwwww!!!!! I know, I KNOW. How disgusting am I?! So I just told him, with nervous giggles, "Honey I just pooped my self,  I feel really humiliated so please don't laugh just ye...." before I could even finish those words, Doug lost it and laughed so hard it got me laughing as well. After seeing that I was really embarrassed he looked at me as we were walking and he said to me, "Honey, I love you no matter what" That was probably the sweetest moment of our whole life together. We hurried home (walking not running) But we had to stop at a neighbor/really good friend's house and I couldn't wait any longer, I asked T if I could use her bathroom and dashed to see the damage. ANNNNNDDDDD guess what!? I DIDN'T poop my shorts! Oh what relieve came over me! It must have been a really lousy fart nonetheless but not poo, NOT poo! So I rushed outside and when Doug and I left for our house I said it had been a false alarm. He was pretty upset that he no longer had the funniest story to tell the world for many many years to come.I was just so relieved that  I didn't,and that got me thinking. In the petrifying 18 and a half minutes I thought I had, I just thought of how love can conquer all. True love that comes from giving ones self to another human being without reservation and not expecting anything back, not the "fancy love" you see in the many romantic comedies on a big screen (notice they never have a "Uhh-Ohh, I just pooped myself"  moment) I felt Doug's love more than I have ever felt it. Yes, it was funny because come on it's a funny subject, but if we can laugh and look past things such as that, I know that we have a pretty amazing relationship. I feel so blessed that I can be all of myself with Doug. He loves me for so much more than I can ever comprehend. Yes, I was embarrassed and yes it was funny, but I do know that if I HAD pooped my shorts my husband would still support and love me and that means the world to me.
                  Every person gets embarrassed about certain things and every person has "an image" that they want the world to see them as, I know I do. But in that very vulnerable moment I thought how humbling it was to experience the most embarrassing situation. Had this happened with someone I didn't completely trust like my husband, I think I would have cried and felt ridiculous. But why? It's an accident that could happen to anyone. I guess the moral of this story for me is, that marriage is wonderful because you have a partner that is going to share with you the most wonderful things and the most devastating things. How cool is it that you have a "locked in friend" that should never leave you just because you pooped your shorts. Thank you Doug for being with me through thick and thin! I love you. P.S. I really didn't want to write about The incident, but something called me to, so I hope it blesses at least one person!  :)

Stay blessed and stay saucy and don't poop your shorts, or do, what ever you want!

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