I Want To Be Like Audrey Hepburn

Did you know that Audrey Hepburn had a crooked tooth?! Neither did I! Why is that at all interesting you ask?Well.. I have a crooked tooth and for the better part of my existence I've plotted how I'm going to make it straight. I try pulling on it. Wishing on a star. I have even considered having dental work recently. I look in the mirror constantly and analyze its positioning and wish for it to grow (for it's a little baby tooth, didn't quite grow as all my other teeth did) and wished for it to get straight. I look at my teeth and think, man, if this ONE tooth was straight, my teeth would be perfect. But that's not where I stop when it comes to my insecurities. If only I had this person's legs, I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a rabbit... Oh wait never mind, just got caught up in my head. Any who, you get the point. I'm constantly picking on myself and the "flaws" that I see in me. Focusing my energy on something so negative that little by little I destroy my spirit and make myself  feel worthless.

How does this all tie in to Audrey? Well I've always loved her for so many reasons. She was fashionable, beautiful and a famous movie star. This is why I bought a coffee table book with a butt load of pictures of her to give as a Christmas present to my aunt Sharon. As I was flipping through the pages, there were many many pictures I had never seen. One in specific revealed. HER crooked tooth.  Did it change the way I saw her? NO, it made me fall in love with her even more. She's an Icon of a woman, thought by millions as one of the most beautiful women in the world and here she had a flaw. WOW. That goes to show that we are many times our worst enemies. We look at ourselves with such a critical eye. God sees us so differently and I am sure it pains him to see how judgmental we are of ourselves. As I flipped further down the book, I saw pictures of Audrey as an older woman hanging out with kids in Africa (she was a huge humanitarian devoting much of her life to UNICEF helping children in need!). She looked even more beautiful to me in those pictures where she had clearly aged than in any other picture I've ever seen of her. Her eyes were so loving and joyful. That kind of beauty only comes from the inside of someone's soul!

If I were to write a list of all the blessings that God has given me, it would super-exceed any list of "flaws". I KNOW this but some days it's just such a difficult concept to grasp. God made me exactly the way he made me for a reason. I should not be rude and Judgy McJudgerson to the creation He so carefully crafted.

Everyone is insecure about something. However, the more aware we are of the fact that our "looks" are only going to go so far, the more at peace we shall be in this world. The only way I can ever be at peace with who I am, is knowing that I was created for a purpose. There is a difference between wanting to have a healthy body, playing with makeup or loving fashion and obsessing with the physical appearance that we have. If you're always wanting to change something about yourself, it's never going to end at that little nip and tuck. You're always going to want more because you're going to be chasing an image that is different than the one you INTENDED to have in the first place.

It is by no means way easier said than done folks. I somehow believe that the more accepting of each other we are the better we'll get at accepting ourselves. We are all in need of one another. So go on. Love on who ever is next to you right now and tell them all the wonderful things you think about them! And YOU write down a list of all the wonderful things you think and feel about yourself. You'll see that you are a flawed perfect package!

I Went Clubbing Last Night

One of the things that makes me most excited in this life is dancing. I constantly have dance parties with my toddler. I am NOT going to lie, we get down! We get down so much that she likes to go on the coffee table and dance on top so she can keep sort of eye level with me. We have dance parties almost every day. The other day we danced for thirty minutes! Wowza! I would never think a toddler would want to dance for a whole thirty minutes (now when I say dance, I do mean bouncing up and down with her little legs and just moving her rump, soooometimes she'll throw in a spin or a shoulder move. I know, very fancy)! I do these dance parties because I LOVE to dance. I don't remember the last time I was at a club... wait maybe I do, it was circa 2009, November to be exact. Just a few days before finding out I was growing a tinny little alien looking gummy bear in my belly. Of course once you have a baby you don't think, "Oh today, I think I am going clubbing". Hahaha, that thought never crossed my mind! But deep down inside the passion for dance is there, thus the amazing dance parties with my baby girl.

Last night I went clubbing. Not only does that feel silly to say because I'm almost thirty, but it's even sillier that I went to an over 18 gay club. And not just ANY club. I went to a club that I myself attended, almost every weekend, circa 2004 with some of my favorite friends. The ONLY reason I went yesterday, was to celebrate my nieces birthday. Her and her friends wanted to go out dancing but they are not 21 yet, thus going to this particular place. I was honored that she thought her old lady aunt would be hip enough to go out dancing with all of her friends, so I could not deny the invitation. As I walked into the club, I was filled with thousands of memories of the " ARC company dance days". As I danced my little tush off, I couldn't help but feel so proud of my friends that I once had the honor of sharing the dance floor with. I'm a completely different person now than who I was way back when and to know that those friends have loved me ever since then, gave me chills and warmed my heart.

Same place, different perspective in life. How cool is that. As I dance with these teens/early twenty something people, all I could think of was, I really hope they get to have wonderful memories and wonderful friendships as I have.

In life, we can't ever chose our family (we need to honor them because they are a gift from God in-spite of how irritating they might seem at times). However, we can choose our friends. Our friends are going to love us, encourage us, tell us we're smoking crack when we do something stupid. Our friends help us find ourselves in this big,big world. God places the friends He thinks are going to help us grow and become a better person in life. These are friendships that can last a lifetime if you work hard at it. Even friendships take  work. But worth every effort.

I say today you take the time to tell your friends how much you freakin' love them. Even when they make you mad, your fiends are always going to know who you are, where you've been and what box you've danced on at the CLUB.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!!!

Just Be Still

I'm looking at the most wonderful view right now and I can't help but feel so small in the midst of all these trees and the mountain range! It is so apparent to me RIGHT this very second that I am NOTHING in this big world and that I am EVERYTHING in this big world. I look at the mountains and beautiful scenery and it makes me think about my life. I realize that life is how I live it. I can get all caught up in the thick of thin things and spin in endless circles worrying about what is "important" in life. The position of a chair, trying to convert someone to like MY baseball team, worrying if I have what it takes to succeed in the world, blah, blah, blah, blah-blah!

Looking at this amazing and endless picture makes me KNOW that God is in charge. God is the big boss of my life and what I think is super "important", God probably doesn't even think about! It's making me want to slow down just a little bit. It's making me want to be free of thoughts and free of judgments, and free of anything that is attached to the world. It makes me want to just sit in God's peace. For I know that when I allow for alone time with God, wonderful things happen.

I eat healthy, exercise, shower daily, all these things to make myself a better person. However, I seldom have time to just sit and be still. This is my challenge for the new year. To just sit and be still and allow God to be the boss.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!!

A Stolen Kiss Never Beats A Willing One

The love that I feel when my daughter gives me a voluntary kiss is something that I would never be able to describe with words! Trust me when I say that I steal kisses from her far more times than she would like, but I can't help it! I have a selfish need, that as a mother, gets fulfilled by receiving love from my little dumpling. I know that the kiss I steal is NOTHING compared to the kiss she gives ME willing. BUT my human nature makes me yearn for that gratification from her, so I resort to using my strength and "authority" by taking a smooch whenever I please.

God NEVER forces his "kisses" upon us. He is always so respectful of us. He waits and he waits until that day when WE want to "kiss" on him and tell him we love him so much. Yes he loves us unconditionally for all of time but he never feels that selfish need I do with Maddy, enough to force his love onto me like I do I her.

Wow, is that admirable or what. He has ALL the power in the world yet he has enough respect for us as human individuals that he just waits. I am so sure than when he hears me telling him I love him so much, he has somewhat of the same feeling I do when Maddy WANTS to show me love. Indescribable.

I hope you are having a wonderful and beautiful day ya'll!

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

Stand In Awe!

Today I wanted to just sit outside and look up to the sky and just be. Just sit there and feel how amazing this life is when I allow for silence and peace. I wanted to turn off the i-phone and just concentrate on one thing. But of course, my want was pushed off by "life"-a makeup session I was running late to, a crying baby wanting food and mommy, and the fact that I had to throw the 'diaper genie smelly cargo' away in the big trash can. I put my baby girl in a safe place and ran outside to throw out the trash and in that moment my body just froze, even though I was in a big fat hurry and my mind wanted to just throw out the trash and jet out, I couldn't! I looked up to the heavens and the beautiful picture that God was painting for me in the midst of the amazingly smelling trash bins crossed with that fresh morning air, yumm-O!

 I stood there for what seemed like an hour, (in reality it was only probably about 3 whole minutes). Alas, in that time I felt the warmth of the sun beaming on my face- I smelled the crisp air of the morning- I heard the beautiful sound of the birds singing me a song written specially for me- I looked at one of the most beautiful pictures I have seen in a long time. Fall colors displayed in all their glorious-ness. Yellow, vibrant orange and brown leaves on an amazing tree in my neighbors yard, paired with the blue sky and the clouds. I took thousands of snapshots of this picture in my mind so I would never forget it. I let the world pass me by for three whole minutes and I thought nothing, I said nothing, I did nothing. I have been wanting to enjoy more of what God has created for me and wanted to try to slow my roll a bit so as to enjoy being in silence. I want it but it's very difficult to happen when I get all wrapped up in the "things" that I need to do. I was grateful for that force pulling me to stay and just be in awe. I am looking forward to being able to set aside time to be able to just sit in awe more often.

What I took from this mini-three minute vacation, was that I CAN have that and I'm sure I'd probably be more at peace on a daily basis if I were to allow myself these moments.

Today look around for the beauty of the world. You can find it in the midst of a smelly trash bin, trust me, I know!

Stay blessed and stay saucy ya'll!!!

My Deepest Darkest Secret

So to contrary believe (in my head), I'm not perfect. *Gasp* *Gasp* I like to think that I could be... (fat chance, haha!) However, I'm personality type A and I'm always trying to better myself inwardly as well as outwardly. I'm constantly thinking of how I can be better, so when I mess up, I feel like running away to Zimbabwe (I don't know why that popped in my head, maybe I subconsciously wanna go there). When I do something wrong, I literary want to just dig a hole and stay in there until I and who ever I wronged forgets the whole ordeal and we can move on with our lives. Well, that behavior becomes difficult once you become an adult. My husband has forbade me to dig any more holes in the back yard... Folks are you ready for this. I made a big mistake recently and I was dishonest with someone very close to me. I HATED the fact that I sinned, but I ABHORRED the fact that it affected someone else. Now I've always been one to think that honesty is the best policy but, I am human and there are many "distractions" in the world that can make even the most goody-two-shoes stray and become a barefoot, bad-dy (just like this joke). I made a mistake and I had to fess up to my dishonesty, yikes!

 Sin, even the littlest one, can be like a super clean windshield with a small dollop of bird crap. Even though your heart is for the most part "clean", your gaze STILL draws to the inevitable bird poo in the midst of your clean windshield. Even when you're trying to pretend there is nothing there, if you ignore your sin and don't bring truth to it, you further yourself from God more and more with each passing day. You can think it's no big deal, all I did was tell a white lie, but God knows and more importantly YOU know that you've done something that is apart from good. That division starts small but if you don't snip it in the bud, you end up with splotches of crap everywhere. Those splotches become more and more accepted by you and your peace and relationship with God starts to waver. NOT because God is pushing you away, but because in the back of your mind you KNOW you've done something wrong and YOU are the one pushing  It would have been easier to take a little Windex and clean off the first little dollop, and just maintain the mess on an ongoing basis. Let's face it we all can have messes on our windshields, we are all bound to. But the faster you come to God with those sins and you let him wrap his blanket of forgiveness on you the faster you'll be taking care of your heart. This is what I was battling with for a while and I finally listened to my conviction to come clean and I have suffered the consequences of my actions, my beloved someone has forgiven me and I feel like I can move on to the next splotch.

I have accepted that I am in no way shape or form perfect and I will probably always have a little poo on my windshield. However, the stronger and stronger I get in my faith, the faster and more conviction i feel toward any sinful nature in my heart. Thank God for His forgiveness. He forgives us faster than we ever will.

Stay blessed and stay saucy!!

In Life-How Do You Want To Live?

In life, if you do nothing, no one will ever criticize you or make fun of you. You might not have to endure any hardships, you won't be ridiculed, or bullied. If you have no opinions or ambitions you might live a very "peaceful" life where the world just seems to revolve around you. In life, if you have nothing to live for, there is nothing to lose. If you don't fight with anyone, there is no saying sorry or having to apologize. If you live your life for yourself, things are so much easier. If you don't make any goals, you can't ever let yourself down (or anyone else for that matter). If you don't dream there is no chance of ever getting hurt.  In life, when you play it safe you're the kid without any bandages on your knees. When you don't make any strides at a better life for yourself you always know what to expect. There is nothing that can go wrong? Right?


In life, when you do something, many people (especially the trolls from the paragraph above) WILL make fun of you, bully you, tear you down. If you have an opinion or ambition you will enter a world where you have to defend your point of view at all cost, you will have to find peace INSIDE yourself because peace will not be a constant in the world around you. You will see yourself as a part of life revolving around the universe and thinking of others. If you have something to live for, there's so much you can lose. If you fight for your relationships and for what you believe in (and I certainly do not mean beating someone up to think the way you do, that's the opposite of what I mean) you live a life of ups and downs, you have to put your "pride" aside and say sorry when it's due. If you make goals, you might let yourself down many times and have to pick yourself back up. If you dream, there is a huge chance that at some point your heart will be so broken, you'll need some crazy glue to put it back together. In life, when you go outside of your comfort zone and face your fears, you're the kid that has a bright yellow cast with a thousand signatures. When you're self reflecting and you're always trying to better your soul, there will always be times of uncertainty and fear. But you will eventually ALWAYS find your way, God will help you find your way. 


Which of these two ways do you want to live your life?


Stay blessed and stay saucy!

The Most Amazing Birthday Ever!

Yesterday was my birthday. I always have a sense of "weirdness" every year on my birthday. I  feel like I should be re-evaluating my life and making sure I'm on the right track...  I am a very spirited and competitive individual and I love competition (mostly with myself, but still) so every year has to "top" the last if you will. Most years of my life I've been pretty happy with what kind of person I've evolved into over that twelve month period. But this year I needed to end my twenty-seventh year of life on a really good note. After a lot of meditation and prayer, I knew I had to some good deed that blessed other people. I knew this because when ever I would think of what I "wanted" for my birthday as far as a present went, I just felt a void and a hunger for something different. While I did run through countless possibilities of what I could ask for from my family and friends I did come across asking for my own very special Marc Jacobs bag-this would have been the most amazing present as it would've had two perks:
 #1.- I could never justify buying one for myself. 
 #2.- For the more obvious perky-perk, they're just gorgeous bags and I've always fantasized about having one. 


However, the more and more I thought about me with my amazing bag hanging off of my shoulder, the more and more I felt a deep desire to take an opportunity... a HUGE opportunity to make a bigger difference in someone's life. I thought, what if I just donate the money. I would take what my husband would of spent on me and just donate it to some charitable place. Nah that didn't feel right. Second idea, WHAT if I ask everyone that might of wanted to get me a little gift to instead of that they just give me some $ and I could donate that to a charitable cause... nah THAT didn't feel right. And THEN I though what IF I make a video and put it on Youtube on my Libby Lu Channel and open it up for anyone who watches it to be able to donate money and I'll take that money and do something amaze-ZING with it!? YES!! But who would I choose to help?


My mom remembered a little orphanage in the town I grew up in, Tizayuca, Hidalgo (in Mexico) that is in desperate need of some lovin'.  I thought what breaks my heart most of all in the world? Kids who don't have their parents and who don't have even the "essentials" we so easily take for granted. BIGGIDY-BAM, SHAZZZAM! There we go. I started with the idea that I would have my sister go to the director of this orphanage and ask what they needed, I would make a video, pray people would help, and then send the money to my sister for her to buy all the needed supplies, and then donate them to those little kids in the orphanage! 


I can not tell you how EXCITED, and amazed I have been this birthday at people's loving hearts. I thought, oh God if I can raise one hundred dollars we'll be blessing those kids soooooooo much. Well it's been a couple of days and we've already raised $435!!!!! WAAAAHHHOOOOO!!!!!!  I can not wait to hear what those kids do when my sister comes to donate all their new, socks, shoes, toothbrushes, school supplies, underwear, blankets, sheets...... the list will go on! I have been blessed beyond believe on this birthday and I can not praise God enough. Thank you to all of the wonderful people who've made this possible! You have amazing hearts! 


This has been the first birthday in my entire life that I've hardly have received any presents. But it has definitely been the most rewarding and amazing ONE! 
Let God show you where he needs you in this world, He's always trying to show us what he made us for, we just need to listen. 


Stay blessed, Stay saucy! 


Here's the link to the website for the orphanage, you can see pictures of the kiddos here. 
AND
If you want to donate click here. (**DONATING WILL NOT BE ABLE TO BE RECEIVED AFTER 11/20/2011, BUT THANK YOU FOR EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT~)
AND
If you want to watch my video, here it is!

Why Are We In Such a Big Flippin' Hurry

Busy body McGee, is what my name is right now. I feel like I'm always in a big hurry ... It's really not helping my IBS (yes folks, I have irritable bowel syndrome, don't make fun of me), not helping my sleep and it is definitely not helping me spiritually.

I can not tell you how frustrating it feels for me to not be able to carry ALL that I need from my house to my car in ONE trip. I'm not joking you when I say that I make it a competition with myself to see if I can carry everything (strategically if you will) so that I don't have to make two trips. Because God forbid two trips would make me a troll or something. - I will carry things in both arms, spread things out on my hands utilizing ALL of my fingers aaaaand my teeth-I have found them to be pretty strong!  I will carry my purse, Maddy's backpack, water bottle, anything I have that needs to go in the car, sometimes even the car seat and most importantly my toddler. I think in all reality it actually takes me LONGER to try to get my entire house on my shoulders and try to make my way out of my very crowded garage into my car without dropping my kid. And in the midst of all this, my armpits are sweating, I'm trying to hold back very violent swear words but I bite my tongue so that I won't be blamed for our 15 month's old potty mouth. And when I finally reach my destination I am about ready to burst, and for what?! So that I could "think" that I saved an extra 2 seconds... I'm crazy!

I could say that I have everything you can think of in the technological world to make my life a breeze. I have most time saving contraptions. So where is my flippin' time going, I'm supposed to be "saving" so much time by having a washing machine, cellular phone, toaster oven, dingle hopper (wait.. that's The Little Mermaid, I forget I'm not her sometimes)

So here's my question, why do we NOT have enough time and why are we so stressed!?  I'll tell you something about myself, as I sat in my car the other day so flustered, wet armpits and all, I couldn't help but wonder, why are my "time" priorities not set straight?  I can go on face book and lose myself for HOURS (disgusting I know) but when I could take my time to not be in such a "hurry" going from my house to my car, I choose to be in a big'ol hurry. I'm sure this is just me and no one else ever experiences any frustration about their time or stress but I needed to vent. ;)

For me, it's helped so much to focus on God and let HIM be in control of my time. He doesn't see time as we do. When I get frustrated that my time is being robbed, I surrender myself to God because I know that I can't do it alone. I hope you guys are having a super blessed night! I love you all of you so much!!

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

Today is My Day Off!

 I'm having one of those really weird days that everything makes me mad, everything gets me irritated. I can't quite place WHY I'm having a crappy day but it feels so stupid to feel in a bad moon when I am blessed beyond believe. I have arms that can hug, legs that can run, fingers that can type, a voice that I can use to sing with (sometimes out of tune, but who cares. Only the dog and my baby girl are subject to it most times). I have eyes that can see (not perfectly because I do have really bad eyesight, but STILL). The list goes on and on and on! I can think of more than thousands of reasons why I shouldn't be in a crappy mood today. But guess what. I am also human and I am allowed days "off" where I can just be in a bad mood. Allow yourself to feel. Don't apologize to yourself why your feeling a certain way, ride the wave of emotion. BUT then move on, pray that God gives you HIS joy for life if you can't feel it for yourself right now. Happiness isn't always attainable in life. But joy for life is. In the back of your mind, knowing that there is a beautiful life to be lived and there are good people in this world, and that there is an ALMIGHTY God that has your back during ANY emotion you might be feeling. He's the one who designed us with so many ranges of emotions after all, so why would it ever be "BAD" to feel them? Today is my day "off". I'll be back tomorrow a more peppy me.

Stay blessed and stay saucy ya'll!

Get Off the Couch and Become Somebody

This week I’ve been thinking about why we as a society love to watch movies such as Rocky or Rudy. Or how come we love to hear about Inspirational stories that overcome all adversity, be it in the news or on Oprah .  I've been giving a lot of thought not only to why we like hearing about these stories, but also about what it takes to BE that person that overcomes life’s challenges and becomes the hero .Or what it takes to be the kind of person that is able to be THE BEST at what they do. 


What makes people excel at things and train so vigorously that the win the GOLD medal in the Olympics? What is that X-factor that those people have that I don’t?  WE love to watch and hear about stories that beat all adversity because WE wish that for ourselves. We want to be the ones beating that temptation of eating a Twinky  to be in the best shape of our life. We want to be that person to run 3 miles every day in order to run a half marathon. We want to be the person who can do it all;  a parent/partner/excellent employee/son/daughter/ friend/ neighbor/Jimmy-Bob Stud.  But more often than not we get caught up in the "busy" part of THINKING about what we want to achieve and planning to do so.  That we forget to get started and make up our minds of the goals we wish to achieve. We set up for failure because rather than just making up our mind that we are going to do something and actually doing it! Instead, we dwell on the start-up process because it's easier to always be "planning" something, rather than DOING something and failing at it.  We think of this brilliant idea that will for sure make us a better person, but the problem is that by the third day we've let it go to because the going got tough. So we start "planning" the next thing we’re going to do to become that perfect human being that we all so longingly desire.


 I say this is all just bologna!  I know that if we just make up our minds of what we want to do, we can do it. It’s too simple for us to comprehend at times. We want attaining success to be this profound hidden treasure that only a few lucky souls get to find, while the rest of us are left out to just watch it on our television . Well I say that it’s the time for all of us to stop making excuses for what we can’t do and start thinking of what we can do. The mind is a powerful tool that can be taken for granted. Sometimes its easier to blame our circumstances, or our parents or  our blah blah blah.  That technique is a whole lot easier because its scary to think that our lives are a manifestation of what we REALLY want for ourselves and what we think about ourselves. It is the hardest thing to do as a human being to look with-in and comprehend that your life sucks because you are choosing it to suck. Or that you are allowing people or things to dictate your joy. Its so much easier to point the finger because then we don’t have responsibility for our choices and the way we react to our circumstances.  To have responsibility is to have the ABILITY TO RESPOND to any situation as you see fit. That means that you have the ability to respond positively  to any circumstance and rise above adversity. Don’t let anyone dictate your joy. Not now, not ever.  Make it a good life! Meditate on what your passion in life is and tell yourself that you can go for it. If it's your passion then it's in YOU for a REASON!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! 


Stay Blessed and Stay Saucy! 

Save Your Relationship

     


I've been happily married for over three years now and my marriage is an amazing roller-coaster. Sometimes we are completely head-over-heals for each other and sometimes.... sometimes let's just say, it takes every ounce of my being not to Karate chop him in the throat! So many times I've wondered why oh why is my husband not giving me the love that I deserve!? And then we bought a book called Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs and I was able to understand 100% what was standing in the way of the love that I was yearning for. I'm not trying to have this act as cliff-notes for the book, I completely know I wouldn't do it justice, BUT I will give you the lib-notes. What I got out of the book per-say. Are you ready?

• Men and women are different (No duh)
• Men hear in blue and women in pink (thus we can say one thing and have two meanings behind it)
• Women love to love and love LOVE love to GET love. Men not so much concerned about the love thing-Here's where it get's INTERESTING... (MEN NEED AND WANT YOUR RESPECT!) SHAZAMMMMM! 
• There is a crazy cycle- If the woman doesn't get love then it's hard for her to give her hubby respect, and if the husband doesn't feel respected, it's difficult for him to display love.
• Don't fret, there is also something called the "Energizing Cycle"- With love she treats him with respect and with respect he treats HER with love. How'bout that!?

   I've been missing this concept my entire life, and now that I see it as plain as day it makes total sense! And trust me when I tell you that it has already saved Doug and I from some, pull your hair, I'm going to go get my nunchucks I'll be right back kind of fights! The catch though IS that someone always has to be the better person EVEN when they aren't getting what they "deserve". So for example one day we were having a heated discussion (well we were fighting, I just like the sounds of the other better). And I was able to not care about the fact that he was being unloving and asked him a very important question. "Honey what did I do that made you feel disrespected?"  Ohhhh my gosh! Boy oh boy do I wish I could do that every time. He told me why he felt like I was being rude to him and it all boiled down to miscommunication. And the argument was over faster than I could say ninja. But had I not had the courtesy to put my feelings aside for a minute to ask him the question, I would have been all mad and angry. Things would of just gotten out of control and before we know it we would have been fighting about something completely different five hours later.  

Since then there have been times when he's had to be the better person, and it makes me feel so loved when he gets interested in what I'm feeling. When he gives me unconditional love, it really MAKES me want to be respectful and loving to him. Try this little method out. And by respect I do NOT mean, be a doormat and never raise any questions or bring anything up for the sake of not arguing. I mean be respectful in the way you treat your man and enjoy all the beautiful LOVE that you'll get from him! 

Women, trust me. If you have a husband or boyfriend who isn't treating you with the love that you deserve, give him that unconditional respect he needs. Be enamored by him and praise him for the man that he is. Remind him that you are not sickened by the person he's become.  Make him feel like you feel PROUD to be his woman and you'll be dumbfounded by how he will in-turn treat YOU. 

Men, trust me. If you have a wife or girlfriend who doesn't treat you with the honor and respect that you crave, give her unconditional love. Don't think that everything she says is to piss you off, or to make you miserable. She is just saying "I'm not feeling loved right now, please love me!"  If you seek to understand HER and in everything make it known that you love who she is, she WILL respect who you are! 

I know it's very difficult to be in a relationship sometimes. BUT it can be done.  To the point that you end up having an intimate relationship that no earthly thing can break.  

Stay blessed and stay saucy everyone!! 

Forgiveness

     

  My birthday is in thirty something days, woohooo!!  Every time one of those rolls around I am forced to think about my life and make sure it's on the right track. As I was thinking of everything that I've done in the past ALMOST 28 years of my life, I couldn't help but remember my childhood. There's a specific point in those wee years that always makes me super-dee-duperly confused because on one hand I get sad about it and on the other it makes me proud of my family and myself. But more importantly, it makes me realize the importance of attitude,love and family. So here it is, I'm going to tell you something that most people don't know about me. When I lived in Mexico and was the very mature age of 6, I had to get a job bagging groceries at the local supermarket so my mom and I could make ends meet. There I said it, I had a job when I was 6! See weird, I'm super proud to say that I was a total working machine at that young age. However, in the same token if I think about it for what it REALLY was and put my daughter in place of me... waterworks!!! I get so sad to think that my mom had to tell me, "Mija, it's time to get a job. You can't watch the smurfs when you get home from school anymore. It's time to grow up." (Granted this is not at all what she said, she didn't even speak English then but that's what I'm making up for the sake of the story. Okay? Okay!)

     Whenever I think back about this time in my life, I seriously don't ever remember any sadness from being poor or bleakness from HAVING to have a job at 6 years of age. In place of any negative feeling, there is a sense of pride and joy that I was able to do all those things and triumph in the end. I would NEVER be the person I am today if it had not been for all of the crummy circumstances in my life. I probably would not be as understanding and resilient as I find myself now. So I am thankful for all of those opportunities that made me a stronger person. And the more and more I think about why it was almost "fun" for me to have a job so young, I realize that it was my mothers AMAZING attitude that helped me not be sad as a child. She has an amazing quality about her that makes her a fighter no matter what life throws her way. At that time she probably had such a  heavy-heart to have to make her little girl go to work. She didn't let on to me that we were in dire need. For me it was as though we had been rich all along. It wasn't until I did have that I understood how much we didn't for a long time.

       My mother had a huge impact on me as a young girl, and then in my teenage years she made some poor choices in her life that have affected me in a lot of ways. For a very long time, I felt so resentful towards her for making me feel like she did. And then God told me to knock it off. When I grasped that my mother is JUST a human being that is trying to make it here on earth as much as the next gal, I knew I could not continue to put her on a pedestal that made her unable to make any mistakes. I had a hard time not seeing my mother as perfect because my whole childhood was happy because of her. She protected me from so much ,gave up and sacrificed even more than I can imagine for my well being. She made it so even in the shittiest of circumstances, I was able to live a loving and some what "normal" childhood (pardon the French, I couldn't find a better word!) She helped me believe in myself. She taught me the power of working hard and being a good, kind person. She taught me that you have to be likable  and funny and to not rely on looks to get you places.  She helped me realize that I really WASN'T the center of the universe like I once had believed, go figure! So you can imagine how difficult it was for me to understand that she's only a human being that has the right to her own mistakes in life ( I saw her more like a cross between Phoenix and Storm, the perfect Super-heroine!)

 There is so much of my mother in me that I am extremely proud to say came from her. Her attitude and love made my childhood one that I remember being filled with joy and happiness. It didn't matter that I had to work at such a young age, because I had my mom to come home to and she was the best mom she could have been to me. In spite of the "bad" choices she's made in her life, God has commanded me to honor my father and mother, He doesn't say, "honor them ONLY if they don't do anything wrong...."  So this is me forgiving my mother of anything she ever did that hurt me in any way. I understand that you are not a super-heroine after all mommy, and that's perfectly okay because you are my MOTHER, and in so many ways that is way cooler!

 Are you holding on to something you should let go of today? Is there someone in your life you're building up to be a superhero rather than a real person that has the right to their own mistakes?  I encourage you to think and pray about it and let it go. Let God be the judge not you. There is an indescribable peace that comes along when we let go and just love people regardless of what they do. I hope you all are having beautiful days! 

Stay blessed and stay saucy! 

Thank you mamacita hermosa.

What Were You Made For?

        One of the most amazing things in life for me is creating, Running around all day thinking of different ideas. I flood my husband's ears with stories of what I "should" be doing. On a daily basis. I tell him what my dreams are, I tell him what fun things I think we should do as a family. I babble on and on about different quests that God has me going into. Poor guy, I think that if he didn't love me as much as he does he would say SHUT IT WOMAN, NO MORE IDEAS FOR TODAY OKAY! And to think that I only share with him probably about half of what really goes on in my head!

             All of the sudden I got this idea that God was calling me to  "change the world". I know what you're thinking. CRAZY right. I know!!!  I've always thought that God wired me to some how become a famous actress and have all this fame and fortune. For many years of my life I enjoyed being on stage and persuing a career in acting/modeling/dancing/singing/being strawberry shortcake for Toys R Us. I actually got paid to be the very last one... see

             I wasn't lying!  After many failed attempts at a non-fulfilling quest for stardom, I called it quits and decided my life had to go elsewhere. Boy am I glad for that decision, for I was extremely blessed with an understanding husband and a freakin' cute ass daughter. Could I ask for more?! NO. However, I STILL had this weird burning desire in my belly that had me wondering, am I where I'm supposed to be and am I doing all that God has created me for? God has placed that fire burning inside of me for a reason. There is something I must do in this life, and God has equip me perfectly to execute it. But what is it!!?? . Those were some of my questions that I would ask myself so many days until one day I got the answer, or should I say I listened!

           My quest is none-the-less being a good example of what God's love can do for a person. I know now that in order for ME to change the world, I need to change for the better every single day. I have to share the love with anyone that will listen. I have to stop clinging on to what I "thought" my life would be and start embracing what my life IS and what I will do TODAY in order to help someone else. When I started thinking of others and not myself is when I knew that the reason God made me wanting to be on "stage" was so that I would do that in His glory and let all who will listen know how much he loves them and how cool it is to be enamored with Him.

           My life is no different than when I had all these questions about who I was. It's no different than when I questioned my purpose in life. The only thing that's changed is my focus to God and paying attention and following Him in what he NEEDS ME to do. Loving one person at a time. Being kind, loving, and respecting the people that are placed in my life.

         It feels great knowing that what I'm doing in my life is hopefully helping others find their place in the world and how to make the best of this life. Today take some time to be in a quiet place and just listen to what God wants YOU to do! Listen and if it's something good you can bet your toshie, it is really God speaking to you.  I hope you have a great day!

- Stay blessed and stay saucy! Oh and check out my Youtube channel HERE! It's full of crazy shenanigans and such. Let me know if there is something you'd like to read about, or some feed back about how these blogs are affecting you! I would love to know if these are really helping anyone..... 

I Want My Toddler's Perseverance!

My baby girl took her first steps at 11 months. They happened to be on the top of the kitchen counter (I think she wanted to make sure that she was going to make a statement)! She kept attempting to "walk" but every attempt just made her look like baby Frankenstein. She crawled faster so she would revert to that in order to get anywhere. However, practice makes perfect right?  Now, it seems as though she's been hitting the baby bar all night ,she can walk like a champ but looks like a Wino wearing a cookie monster diaper. She has been growing more and more independent to the point that we are in the stage that I would guess makes most mommies cry (I've already cried millions of times),the get-out-of-my-face-and-let-me-walk-woman stage. She wants to spend less time in my arms and more time getting into big time trouble. That's okay with me, I know she has to grow up! I'm am actually very excited for her life, I just get nostalgic from time to time. 


I sit at home and just watch her play and create and get busted. I watch her so much because it fascinates me (not in a creepy way, more like in a way normal way to where I DO get other things done other than just stare at her all day. In case you were wondering). But the reason it fascinates me so much is that she will walk and fall, walk, walk, walk, and fall. Walk, walk, walk, fall, fall, walk. You get the point. Time after time she gets up from falling down with no frown in her brow. She just knows that to get better at this walking game she has to get up and try again. She has never stayed down from a fall. That really got me thinking! 


How many times have I "fallen" in my life? Too many to count, I don't have enough fingers and toes.  However, my attitude is some times sour about these falls. When I'm down, it's hard to know if I can or even want to get back up. Looking at my baby girl get up time and time again with a joyful attitude reassures me that it's all about attitude. It's difficult to place such responsibility on myself to look at the glass half full, but life just seems so much better when I do. Today are you going to let your "fall" get in the way of moving forward stronger or are you going to let it sink you until it's impossible to see the top? Think about it. 


Stay blessed and stay super saucy!!!


If you liked this post don't be stingy, share it with your friendsies! 




  

OPPORTUNITY

                Oh it feels so good to be back! We had an amazing vacation. Although, I think when you're a mommy you don't really get vacations, because your work just happens to follow you no matter where you go! We had a great time none-the-less. I did have a vacation on cooking and doing dishes which is more than I could have hoped for. In the ten days we were gone we spent a week at family camp in Forest Home. A place that is dear to my husbands heart, and now mine as well. It's a Christian camp that he grew up going to every summer with his family. I loved it the minute we got there two years ago and I would love, God willing, to go every summer. I think it allows me to chill out for a whole week and listen to what God's been trying to tell me all year long. Don't get me wrong, this place as much as I would like it, is not magical. It's not as if this is the only place you can go to hear God. I just know that it is a place where you leave all of the worldly distractions behind and therefore God can really speak to you. I think that you can find the same thing if you were to give yourself that time of solitude any place you are, but for most of us folks, the world just gets in the way. Here is one of the messages that I received this marvelous week

              When we got to forest home on a Sunday evening, I was waiting to all of the sudden feel all warm inside and have all these wonderful, magical feelings surge through my body. I thought it was going to be a week full of no conflict and no mean spirits. What I got instead was a nice fight with Doug about the organization of our teeny-tinny little room that we had to call home for the next six days. I wanted to put everything in its place before doing anything so I wouldn't go crazy and Doug wanted to go to the pool (both very valid points). So I took longer in my organization than Doug would have wanted and we started quarreling. Then Madelyn got diarrhea and we had to change her diaper like ten times in a matter of two hours, OK a bit of exaggeration never hurt anyone! AND THEN, Maddy got a mad rash and she was just miserable. What happened to my perfect week!? I was beginning to think that God wasn't going to make as big as an impact this week as he had two years ago when Doug and I visited Forest Home with out a baby. Well let me tell you what else went wrong, Doug got supper supper sick, he had violent throw up and we had to miss out on a whole day of fun activities (including the night zip-lining. I know, I know!) Then my asthma was making me miserable. Then I went on a run while Maddy and Doug were napping and when I came back two hours latter (in my defense I didn't have a watch) I was totally busted for being out for so long. And then, and then, and then, and then, and then! So many "crummy" things were happening to us, how in the world were we supposed to enjoy our vacation!? Well, here is when I heard God's message loud and clear. (This is God talking in my head, imagine it being said with a voice so deep and so powerful) "Libier, get outside of yourself and look at all the blessings you DO have, adjust your attitude and take all these "crummy" situations as opportunities to get closer to ME, and to allow me to do some work in you, because I know you need it." Shazzam! Ok, I guess I have been pretty petty in thinking that the world needs to slow down completely and that I can't go through any turbulations in order to be in love with God and to find blessings even in the crap things of life. What I realized is that, there will never be a moment of our lives where something wrong can't happen. But there could always be a greater submission of ourselves to God and letting  him lead us through the terrible things in life. He doesn't create these bad circumstances but He always filters them, and promises us that if we choose to let Him, he will always find blessings in any "bad" situations. All of the sudden, I kept thinking of all our hiccups as little opportunities to give up my control and let God lead. I noticed that it is more exhausting trying to do things on my own and trying to fix my life myself, than to allow an Almighty God  to.

                After realizing the great opportunity, I had an amazing time, in-spite all that happened through out the week. I can't say that I just willed it to be done and I was able to maintain this grateful attitude every time something would go wrong. I was always challenged, but coming to God every single time and being conscious of the choice I was making helped me get through the crappy things that I was experiencing. I hope you allow God to help you with what you need the most. The world is so full of things that can rob our time and efforts and sometimes it feels as though we are being fulfilled by our subscription to Netflix, or our super expensive car we just bought, alcohol/drugs, yummy food, sex, or our "hobby" we spend thousands of dollars on, or what ever other possessions you can think of. But for me, realizing that the only thing that could ever fulfill my heart in such a way that I am not OF the world is God, has been one of the most amazing things that has brought complete peace in my heart. Nothing else can satisfy me, that is why when I try to feel full from any worldly THINGS, I just feel so let down. Only God can satisfy my yearning, and only He can help me through the crap of life. I will take bad situations as opportunities to show me that I can do all things in He who strengthens me.

IF you liked this post, please do me a favor and pass it on to someone you love. Thank you! Stay blessed and stay saucy!

For Better Or For Poop In Your Shorts!

                I'm pretty sure I don't want to be writing this blog right now. And I'm pretty sure this has been a very very embarrassing day. Doug and I went on our long run today and since we didn't wake up early we did it at 3PM and it felt as if it were 139 degrees out side! I was having a really really hard time with my breathing and I  felt nauseous, but I wanted to continue running because I didn't want to make Doug not finish his run, so I pressed on. DISCLAIMER: If you get grossed out easily please stop reading and come back to the next blog, you really don't want to read this if you're easily repulsed. OK for those of you who stuck around, congratulations, you and I will be much closer next time we see each other. Moving on!

               The heat was intense and I had to stop running for a second to catch my breath and for a split second I thought, "Oh I think I have to fart, I'll do it now that no one but my baby and husband are around." I pushed with all my might and I definitely felt poop in my shorts! I could not believe I had just pooped my shorts. What the what!? So many thoughts went through my head! Oh Lord do I just hide this from  Doug and get home as fast as possible to get cleaned up? Well, we had about a mile and a half left on our run, I was NOT going to run with poop on myself, and I wasn't going to not say anything and then have Doug smell something rather unpleasant OR for that matter SEE something on my shorts. Eeeeeewwwwwwww!!!!! I know, I KNOW. How disgusting am I?! So I just told him, with nervous giggles, "Honey I just pooped my self,  I feel really humiliated so please don't laugh just ye...." before I could even finish those words, Doug lost it and laughed so hard it got me laughing as well. After seeing that I was really embarrassed he looked at me as we were walking and he said to me, "Honey, I love you no matter what" That was probably the sweetest moment of our whole life together. We hurried home (walking not running) But we had to stop at a neighbor/really good friend's house and I couldn't wait any longer, I asked T if I could use her bathroom and dashed to see the damage. ANNNNNDDDDD guess what!? I DIDN'T poop my shorts! Oh what relieve came over me! It must have been a really lousy fart nonetheless but not poo, NOT poo! So I rushed outside and when Doug and I left for our house I said it had been a false alarm. He was pretty upset that he no longer had the funniest story to tell the world for many many years to come.I was just so relieved that  I didn't,and that got me thinking. In the petrifying 18 and a half minutes I thought I had, I just thought of how love can conquer all. True love that comes from giving ones self to another human being without reservation and not expecting anything back, not the "fancy love" you see in the many romantic comedies on a big screen (notice they never have a "Uhh-Ohh, I just pooped myself"  moment) I felt Doug's love more than I have ever felt it. Yes, it was funny because come on it's a funny subject, but if we can laugh and look past things such as that, I know that we have a pretty amazing relationship. I feel so blessed that I can be all of myself with Doug. He loves me for so much more than I can ever comprehend. Yes, I was embarrassed and yes it was funny, but I do know that if I HAD pooped my shorts my husband would still support and love me and that means the world to me.
                  Every person gets embarrassed about certain things and every person has "an image" that they want the world to see them as, I know I do. But in that very vulnerable moment I thought how humbling it was to experience the most embarrassing situation. Had this happened with someone I didn't completely trust like my husband, I think I would have cried and felt ridiculous. But why? It's an accident that could happen to anyone. I guess the moral of this story for me is, that marriage is wonderful because you have a partner that is going to share with you the most wonderful things and the most devastating things. How cool is it that you have a "locked in friend" that should never leave you just because you pooped your shorts. Thank you Doug for being with me through thick and thin! I love you. P.S. I really didn't want to write about The incident, but something called me to, so I hope it blesses at least one person!  :)

Stay blessed and stay saucy and don't poop your shorts, or do, what ever you want!

Pornography

              Racy title eh? I know what you're thinking, nasty,right? Well aren't you a little curious why I would name a blog this word? Well, party it was to get your attention (and it worked didn't it!?) and partly it was because it has something to do with this week's blog. Go on if you dare....
             I follow a wonderful girl on Youtube that has a website dedicated to changing lives by providing fitness videos and diet tips. I found her about two months ago and ever since then I've been hooked. This gal is amazing and has the strongest body ever. She is a beautiful girl inside and out. Her videos are funny and provide you with the tools necessary to take your fitness goals to the next level with out having to leave your home.  Plus her workouts are super short and easy (NOT! THEY ARE THE TOUGHEST WORKOUTS I'VE EVER DONE!) but short for the most part, which is crucial for me since I'm a mommy on the go! Any who, I hope if she ever gets to read this blog she doesn't get offended. I actually think the world of her even though I've never met her. But here's why I named the blog the way I did. About a month ago I found out that my girl had been in the pornography industry a long time ago and automatically my view about her changed. I all of the sudden felt as if I didn't know her...... (Umm, funny thing is I DON'T really know her but you know what I mean) I was having a really hard time watching her work-out videos and thinking what drove her to do such thing. Here are two parallels at plane sight. She used to be in a taboo industry and now she's helping millions of people transform their lives. What a contrast!  I got to thinking about what makes me anyone to judge her. Here's the thing, if you or I had proof of every thing that we regret in our lives on the internet we would have no excuse to point any fingers at anyone about their mistakes. If anyone could just type in, Libier's mistakes on Google.com,  I would be screwed! The expression, don't point your finger at anyone because you have three pointing right back at ya' is so true to me right now!   I know all of my sins and all the things that I regret in my life and to even just think about them makes me cringe. Can you imagine if it was in plain view for the whole world to see? I would just want to curl up in a little ball and hide. Now,is that what "my friend" has done? NOPE! She is out there being a positive force for the whole world to see and to help people. She found her calling and she never looked back. Who am I to judge her or anyone else?! No one, that is. Why was I letting her past influence how I viewed her now, especially since she's even helping me so much by motivating me and providing me with workouts that have helped me get stronger!
 I think it's funny how our human nature works, I see someone who is doing something bad and I criticize them with out thinking and I can talk about other people's misfortunes like I know what I'm talking about, as if I have nothing in my skeleton closet. But God knows all. He does not see a difference in sin. He sees my sin of judging and being nasty towards others as sad as "my friend" being in porn. I know that's hard to comprehend, but it is true. My thoughts are that I need to quit being a Judgy McJudgerson and just leave that up to God (harder said than done, but it is my goal to be less judgmental). It's amazing the things we can do with God's strength.The changes that can manifest in our souls if we allow his holy presence to be in us and shine. My human nature is way to ugly for me, I know that I NEED God in my life to help me be a better person. And he does every time I let him, every single time!

Thanks for reading folks. Stay blessed and for heaven's sake.... stay saucy!!!

A Year of Madre-hood. Ay-ay-ay!

           So many exciting things are happening in our lives right now! Maddy is turning one, Doug is thriving in his job, and I am finding amazing blessings each day being a wife, mommy, and homemaker. God is blessing us so much, but if you can please say a prayer for my father. He's not doing too hot right now and he needs prayers all arouund the world! He is going to be okay, but his platelet count is down again and he had to go to the hospital again. Any way please pray for him to recover and to have his platelets multiply!
           This year of mommy-hood has had its shares of ups and downs. The ups have been higher than a stoney boloney on spring break and the lows have been lower than a grandfathers ba... I won't finish that. But I will tell you something, I've been weaning Maddy from the boobie juice for two weeks now and we are now down to just two feedings a day. One in the morning and one before bed. I'm not going to lie when I say that yesterday was the day we were supposed to cut out the morning boob. Annnnd guess what? I couldn't do it. I know that Maddy once she's not nursing anymore is still going to love me and know I'm her momma, but to tell you the truth I feel so nostalgic about this bond being on its final stretch. So I didn't cut the morning feeding because I just want to enjoy the last weeks of nursing her, because really soon she's going to be walking and on to a new phase of her life. It's hard for me to believe that we've made it a year (almost). With 17 more days until my baby girls 1st birthday, there is definitely something going on in my soul that I can't explain. I am sad and I am over my head happy for this marks the first of many birthday celebrations, God willing. I can't even begin to describe what motherhood has done for me over this past year. But I can tell you that something so mundane as just sitting at home and watching my baby girl play with her stuffed animals is something that gets me teary-eyed and I feel this wonderful rumble in my stomach that I have never in my life felt before (and no it's not just gas, I checked for that too). I feel so proud of her when she does something as silly as drink her water from a cup. I could just play with her all day. She's a really sweet baby girl and I hope that I'm doing a good job at being her mother so she can grow up being a confident little girl. I guess I'm so head over heels that the other day I was holding her and just wondering, what was I doing before you? I can't remember life with-out you. Thank you Madelyn for providing me with the circumstances for me to become a better person, growing in patience, kindness, patience, love, patience, joy, ohh and have I mentioned patience? Thank you for your warm smile when I need it the most. Thank you for making me laugh so hard I cry and then I feel like a weirdo that's laughing all by herself at home with no one around aside from you. :) Thank you Madelyn for helping mommy and daddy get closer to God and therefore getting closer to each-other to form a better unit and a even more fantastic team. Thank you honey for your tantrums and your sick days that bring out the best of mommy. Thank you for letting me experience all your firsts. It's been an honor and a blessing being able to stay at home with you and witness every part of your development. I love you Madelyn and I thank God you are in my life every single day! Here's to the second year of this shindig. I hear it's quite eventful, well I say.... Bring it ON!!

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

Perception, perception, perception.

This story is all 100% true, but the people in it are disguised with different names to protect their identity… Read on if you must. The other day I was talking to my friend Falula on my couch and we were disclosing some pretty saucy secrets about ourselves. She was so awesome to be completely honest with me and tell me that when she first met me she was intimidated by me (it must have been my stature and amazing muscles that did it).  She went on to tell me a story where a loooooooong time ago she decided I wasn’t quite made up to be her friend. There was an incident where in doing her make up with a different friend of mine, let’s call her…. Gladys, Falula pulled out her “Wet-N-Wild” eye shadow. As her finger caught the dollop of makeup and slowly and dramatically moved inch by inch, closer and closer to her eye lid……. Gladys gasped the most horrible gasp a girl named Gladys could produce and said; “Why Falula, what in the name of all that’s fashionable and hip are you doing!? Are you really putting “Wet-N-Wild” on your face?! Libier (that’s me) would NEVER do that!” And there you have it folks. Falula for sure thought I was a crazy ol’ make-up freak that would never put the kind of make-up she thought was perfectly okay, on my face. And with a simple piece of data about who I was, she formed a skewed perception of me, and I don’t blame her.

Okay, funny thing is that while yes, I used to be a makeup snob for whatever reason, that single factoid about me did not make up who I was in its entirety. I am sure that there was and is more to me than just liking materialistic things. But,when we don’t have all of the information on a person or a situation, it is very difficult to formulate an accurate report of who they are or what the situation is. NOT to say I’ve never assumed someone was a particular way based on a tinny factoid, just saying that it’s not the best way to figure someone out is all. I’ve done that many times just so you know. But I do believe in getting better and better as a person, and this is something super important because it’s sad to know that some of the things we like or we stand for will be staples of how others view us. And sometimes it’s not in the best light.  I started thinking about people in my life and how I view them, after analyzing my thoughts and behavior I came to the conclusion that everyone is just really scared and we ALL want to fit in and to be liked….dare I say LOVED and accepted. It makes me want to cry that Falula and I couldn’t dig deeper to see if there was more to our friendship other than our disagreement on a brand of make-up. I am glad that she and I have become closer and she now sees that there is more than meets the “wet-n-wild” eye with me. But that took years to happen. What amazing friendships are you losing out on based on your perception of peeps you’ve met?! Can I just say that my priorities have shifted a tiny bit and if you were to look in my make-up bag right this second you WOULD find a compact of “Wet-N-Wild” powder in it, just sayin’. Gladys don’t cry now..

Stay blessed and stay saucy people!

Horrible Day (With a side of salmon and a puppy!)

I seriously just had the most intense day. It was scary and super emotional! First things first. My mom needed me to pick up some medications her Dr. was going to have her try out, so I went to the afterhours clinic on Stockton Boulevard (already a little scared are ya? J.K. Stockton isn’t that scary). Maddy had JUST fallen asleep so I put her car seat in the stroller and strolled my booty up to the reception office at Dr. Fakerhy’s (um, imagine my mom saying this with her Mexican accent, I thought I had to wash her mouth with soap the first few times she was telling me her Dr.’s name) I got the meds and asked the receptionist if I could speak to the Dr. and as I was waiting a very large man walked in the office. He took a seat and just stared at the receptionist, within a few seconds of very creep-ly staring action he started screaming, yes I said SCREAMING at the top of his lungs, “Well, are you going to give me some salmon while I wait for this Dr. or what!?” Receptionist, “Ummm, we don’t sell any food here.” Very large man, “Sooo what am I supposed to do while I’m waiting here! Huh!? I’m starving! I need mental health help?!” Me “Ah, I don’t need to speak with the Dr. anymore” With the fastest I’ve ever moved Maddy’s stroller, ping, I was out the door! I was so scared for Maddy and my safety because the man followed me out. I kept praying for God to protect us and he totally did. Once I got into my car I was literally shaking. I don’t know why, but now that I’m writing this, it seems kind of silly and it’s making me giggle a little but I was legitimately scared when I was experiencing it! I have never been so shaky in my life. I think that having Maddy made me even more scared because if it had just been me I don’t think it would’ve been such a big deal.  

Second part of this intense and scary day: As I was driving home from dropping of my mom’s medicine, I was on the freeway and from really far away I could see the car in front of me slowing down, but I didn’t slow down enough. I had to pretty much slam on my breaks because before I could say Dr. Fakerhy the car in front of me was at a dead stop. But no one else on the freeway was. I then glanced at my review mirror and the car behind me was about to hit me, but he swerved very efficiently to the left and got us both out of harm’s way. Then the car in front of me speed off to the left and I was left with the most devastating picture ever. A run over puppy! I did not know what to do and all I kept thinking was poor puppy and oh God I do not want to cause a huge accident on the freeway. So I continued forward and went over the puppy because I was dead stopped and every other car to my right and my left was zipping by at 60mph! I didn’t hit the puppy, I just went over it but after looking back and seeing it one more time, I just lost it. Hysterical crying. I haven’t cried as much as I did today in a long while. I was so scared for so many lives and so sad for the poor little creature that had been run over. But Alas, life goes on. It just sucks that we have to experience such sad, scary or difficult days. The one positive thing I took out of it is that I cannot appreciate the really good days if I don’t learn from the crap ones. I am truly blessed in so many ways though! I know my blessings outweigh the “bad” experiences of today. I know that I have something great looking after me and protecting me from anything I cannot handle.  I feel so grateful to have God in my life every day, but especially in days such as today. I hope you all are having wonderful days!

Stay blessed, stay saucy!

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You Have To Be Willing To Fall!

Yesterday will mark a day in my life’s history that I will never forget. It will go down as the day I threw a bigger tantrum than my 9 month old could ever think of. I am not proud of it folks, but I must make it more than just the day I threw a tantrum, I must write about it so maybe someone could get something out of my shortcoming.  

My husband is the type of guy that loves to do lots of active/sporty things.  He’s always up for going on walks (this is especially humorous, when he tries to get my entire family to go on a walk after dinner! After many attempts, my brother finally caved and promised Doug to go on a walk only and only after Thanksgiving dinner every year.) With this love for sports and outdoor fun comes my disinterest in them. You would think I enjoy it, but sometimes, I don’t . I do it for him because I know it’s important that we compromise and that we show interest in each other’s interests. So when Doug suggested we go on a family bike ride yesterday, I said yes because I had no idea what was in store. Here is my background in bike riding; I haven’t ridden a bike since I was probably 5, and even then, I only really got a couple of “riding” times, if you even want to call it that. After getting married, Doug got me a bike and I had to kind of re-learn how to maneuver the thing. Here are my bike riding highlights, just so you know the extent of my novice-hood; 1.- when I got my cruiser bike, I wasn’t used to the breaks being on the pedals, so instinctively I kept trying to go to the handles. Doug was bothered by the fact that I kept ringing my bell so many times that he yelled “Why do you keep ringing your bell!?”  Well I wasn’t trying to ring ANY bells, I was trying to break the darn thing. 2.- I FELL off of my bike when it was stationary! Yes, we were just standing waiting to go at an intersection and I got started and FELL to the side brining my bike down on top of me! So you see, I am not at all an expert at riding at all! PLUS, I’m a big scaredy cat! Yes, I said it a BIG scaredy cat. So add these all together, throw in a hard bike trail course… add a very steep hill… with a little bit of panting…struggling to get up it… wishing I had never said yes to the “bike ride” … follow that by the creepy man staring at me trying to pedal for my life, grinning at me…and the ease of Doug going up the hill whilst pulling the trailer our 18lbs baby is in… and ladies and gentlemen you got yourselves a tantrum!! I knew I wasn’t going to make it up the very last part of the hill and I was imagining what I would look like falling backwards and then my bike coming to meet me at the bottom of the hill. So I stepped off my bike and yelled “THIS IS SOOOOOO STUPID! I HATE THIS!” Aaand the waterworks began. Doug was so taken aback by my frustration and tears, that all he could do is repeat how sorry he was for making me come on this death trail. For 10 minutes all I could do is, cry. Can you imagine a twenty-seven year old, grown woman crying while riding her bike? Well that was me. At the very end of the bike ride I kept thinking how upset I was that he would make me do something I wasn’t ready for, something that I was scared of. Had he described to me what it would be like before going, I would have said no. But I would have missed out on seeing how I react to life throwing something at me that I am not comfortable with! Why did I get so mad at my husband? He is helping God to mold me into a better person. He is taking these situations and helping me overcome fears I’ve had for ages by gently making me come face to face with them.  At the time it doesn’t feel like it to me, but he is doing something good rather than just trying to torture me. I can be the type of person that likes to stay in the boundaries of what’s comfortable. In the boxes of what I’m good at, I like to say I’m a thrill seeker, but only the thrills that I view safe, or easy, or things that come naturally to me (I think we’ve all established that bike riding is NOT one of them.) But how can I ever be a better person if I don’t expose myself to situations that can help me grow? Why is it so hard to get rid of a fear? Doug was helping me get free of these chains that feel so heavy at times, that prevent me from doing things that I “think” are scary but when I let go could be fun in the end. On our way home there was one last hill we had to ride over. A freeway overpass that goes up then goes down. Doug was so kind to ask me if I wanted to walk it and I said yes…But something made me change my mind and while I was riding up the hill I still felt a little bit of fear. Once we were on our way down there was a sense of accomplishment in my soul.  I even let go of the breaks and put my legs out (for like a milli-second, BUT STILL!) I felt so free. Thank you Doug for always finding a way to scare the shiitake mushrooms out of me and introducing me to new things in life! I love you and I would not be the woman I am today without your help!  Folks, what are your fears? I suggest you go and try to overcome one this week. Ask someone close to you to help you out, but you have to be willing to let yourself fall. Now, go kick that fear’s A-double snake and put it in your past. Because it can be done! 

Stay blessed, stay saucy!