She Stole My Necklace

One thing I hate in parenting is having to discipline my children. I. Hate. It. I would rather be having fun with my children. BUT I am their mother and God is calling me to be a godly mother that will think and pray heavenward about all my parenting choices. Discipline is a good thing when done in prayer and in love.  The Holy Spirit is always willing to help me parent my children.  I've learned that in every situation I have to discipline, there is a beautiful opportunity to show God's love and point my children toward his grace.  

This morning was my four year olds Thanksgiving presentation at her school. Of course we all had to get ready a little more than usual. so there was a very Chirst like sense of chaos and urgency in our home. I like to be sacrasctic, can't you tell? I was frantically looking for my necklace I had left on my vanity and I could not find it. I called Maddy into my room and asked her if she had seen it and she said she hadn't. We have had such a history with her breaking my jewelry, her and I, that I did not believe her for a moment.  I told her to please tell me the truth and she did. She took the necklace and now can't find it anywhere. I serious to goodness was so dissapointed. I was mad and I wanted to just yell at her. This will be about the fifth thing she's either broken or misplced. I have had problems with my anger and all I kept thinking was, "In your anger, do not sin". I cooled down and told her I needed a moment to think and pray. That I was upset at her choice. We got in the car and she wanted to talk to me and I told her I couldn't. 

As we drove to school I could feel her shame. I could feel the way she felt. So ashamed and sad at the bad choice she had made. To have failed once again. As I had some quiet to pray and think I felt the Holy Spirit remind me of how many times my father in Heaven has forgiven me. And how many more times he'll have to. How he's never said to me. "I am too mad to talk to you right now."  I knew my little girl would probably have a terrible day and a horrible time on the stage trying to sing if I didn't talk to her and remind her of my love for her and God's love for her. This is what I said to her before we got out of the car to drop her off. 

"Honey I know that you feel badly for taking mommy's necklace. I am very disapointed in the choice that you made. And there will be a consequece for your choice when we get home. However, I want to talk to you about Jesus and his grace right now. I am like you. Just a little older... (I know, I know but she doesn't have to know how old I am just yet) I too make bad choices and if I come with a sincere heart toward Jesus and ask for his forgiveness, he will graciously give it to me. And his love for me will never end. And neither will his love for you EVER end and neither will mine. I need you to know that there are consequinces for all th choices that you make. You are loved and you will be forgiven. I can only hope that next time when you are tempted to take another necklace you will pick the better choice. You are a great kid and I love you and this doesn't take away from the other good choices you have made. I want you to go to shcool and to go on stage knowing you are loved." 

She was so happy and no longer had that shame on her beatifulul little face. Once we got home she paid the consequence I had for her.  She came to me and said. "Mommy after my 'consquequence' can I come say I'm sorry to you?" with little tears in her eyes. I said, "Of course you can." It gives me joy to think that at four she already has such a beaitful heart. 

I asked God to help me not to make her feel afraid to tell me the truth, I asked God to help me point her to Him, and I asked him to help me figure out a discipline that was lasting and not just momentarly effective. I also asked God to help me convey to this precious four year old that she is WAY more important than a necklace to me and that making good choices is better  because it makes our hearts full of peace and joy. I asked God to help me love her even when I didn't feel loving toward her because I was mad. I do feel like he answered my prayer. 

I pray for you and your parenting too. If you're having a hard time my heart goes out to you.I KNOW it's not easy. But all is possible with God almighty! So cling on to his hand for he is one mightly and powerful God! 

-Stay blessed and stay saucy

Libier 

And They Said I Couldn't Garden

I have a black thumb.  There, I said it. I think I bring my family disgrace by such wretched and awful gardening skills. I was tempted to take a picture of the recent flower that died on me for you guys to fully understand the way that I am capable of killing plants. But I spared your eyeballs. You. Are. Welcome. 

We have a flower box that I begged my husband for below our window that faces the street. I envisioned red beautiful flowers thriving in all their glory. I asked for the budget to purchase those flowers and my husband said I better buy them some place that can return them in case they died. He knows me all too well. I told him to give me a year and if I killed them I would just buy fake ones and never bother with buying any living organism ever again.  He came in one day from the yard and tells me "honey your plant out back... [I looked at him as he caught my attention] .."IT'S thriving!" If you couldn't tell by the capitalized AND italicized word, he was smiling with sarcasm. Just as that plant had died a terrible death, so did my red geraniums in my planter box.  Mind you, I asked for plants that you couldn't kill. Oh these are resilient they said, you won't kill these, they said...  They hadn't even made it half the year and they all looked dead and so sad. SO I returned them and got fake ones. I did however manage to not fully kill two little bundles. So I thought I would plant them in my "once thriving with plants that I also killed round spot" for the longest time nothing was happening. All I saw were green leaves. That's a good sing though. Anything not brown in plants is good right? So I left them. Doug kept threatening me to rip them out, to replace them with a tree but I kept asking him to give them a chance. 

A few weeks ago as I pulled in my driveway a bright red color caught my eye! MY FLOWERS BLOOMED! My four year old got so excited with me she tells her dad, "Daddy mommy's garden is so beautiful". Ahhhhh bless the hearts of little children. So we named the flower FAITH. I am happy to report that because God has sent in some rain (because I have forgotten to water the thing) FAITH the geranium, has multiple buds of flowers and she is beautiful. Not only has she endured all sorts of adversity (ANY plant that can withstand my black thumb is a resilient survivor. ) But she in comparison to my FAKE plants now residing on my window box- looks stunning. Those fake plants do not hold a candle to her TRUE colors and spirit. Even though she doesn't look perfect, even though some of her leaves have holes in them, EVEN though some of her flowers are a little dried out, her beauty so radiates from the inside and has truth and life ringing through her that all of the other "perfect" looking flowers are left in the background and all I want to look at every time I pull in, is her. I know she didn't do it on her own. God has helped her and strengthened her. If he has done that for her what more can he do for us? 

Now something else that blessed my heart so much here is that the other day I went up to look at FAITH the geranium and to my surprise the plant that I for sure thought was dead next to her is now full of little buds that will flower in a few days. FAITH inspired her friend to bloom for herself! What an image. I hope to God that you are following my crazy mind here. When we abide in God and we allow him to help us have fruit, we inspire those around us to trust him to do the same for them. I hope that if you're feeling today that you are that flower on it's last days hanging by a thread, you've been beat up, you've endured your own version of my black thumb. I pray and hope that you hang on. That you ask God for his help and that you abide in his word and watch to see if he doesn't grow some amazing flowers in your heart.  He is willing and he is able! Bloom on lover muffins! 

Here's a picture of my FAITH and the fakies. Look for yourself, which flower would you rather be? 

Stay blessed and stay saucy! 

-Libier

Healing In The Pain

If I can be honest with ya'll I've been going through one of the most excruciatingly painful times of my life. It has been a very difficult season in my life and my families as well. When momma ain't happy ain't no body happy, has been a true and tried motto in this house. I've asked that God's grace would cover much of the crazy mood swings I've been having and I know that his grace HAS covered so much of my shortcomings this past year. 

I am going through a healing time with God. He has called me to the wilderness with him and we are sitting in a very dark, very painful and uncomfortable place Him and I. Before I started reading my bible a lot more consistetnly I didn't know that there was much of my life that needed to be changed. I think I was living in a safe reality that I had so carefuly created for myself. I was safe. I pretended to myself that I  was "content" with my place in life and I wasn't going to take many risks. As long as my little world spinned my way, I was fine. I did so much to try to control my life and that of my husband and kids, in order to not feel out of control.  But to be honest it was getting to be too exhausting and I could tell something was wrong, I just coudln't tell you what the heck the matter WAS. I was trying to fix things as they poped up instead of going to the root of my issues. 

I knew before I started reading my bibile that I had many flaws. I knew that. But I didn't know that God wanted to help me shed some of the things that were hindering me from knowing him better and from living a life full of adventure, joy and peace. FREEDOM was something I thought I had, until now. I KNOW God is setting me free as we speak. It wasn't until I was honest with myself and with God about the state of my heart that the healing began.  I didn't trust God. I wasn't free and I didn't show many signs of the fruit of His spirit. I knew I was being a hypocrite calling myself a Christian when the life I lead pointed the opposite direction. 

As I am healing, God keeps helping me understand each step when I am ready. Right now I am in the stage of acceptance. I am praying for God to help me have acceptance be the backbone of my healing. When I first learned that I had been sexualy abused I didn't want to belive the little girl inside me telling me there was something wrong. God exposed all the truth so it would set me free. It has been the most painful thing I've ever felt as a thrity year old woman to admit to herlsef that she has been badly hurt. But in accepting it, I have been able to experience peace.  I have been able to understand myself a little deeper and to KNOW that it was NOT my fault. It was not ME. THAT didn't come from me not matter how my body reacted. There has been an extreme change in my heart. I no longer feel angry all the time. God has allowed me to process my emotions in His loving arms. I struggle with anxiety and I have had more panic attacks than I'd like to admit. But through every one, the minute I allowed it to just be, the minute I surrendered ALL of my emotions to God; it was as if black tar was flowing from my heart outward into the His light and being changed into good energy instead of being stuck inside of me and coming out at non-welcomed times and places. I knew that if I didn't decide to heal with God on this, that it would eventually kill me. If it didn't kill me physically it would have mentally and emotionally. 

That is why I am trusting God to help me heal. But with healing, comes pain. I have been so badly hurt in my life that I am terrified of pain. The more I heal, the more accepting of pain I become. I welcome it because  I would rather be in pain and know peace and my savior than be pretending nothing is wrong and feeling hopeless, bitter and angry. There is healing in the pain. There is an end to the madness. My pain becomes energy to help someone else with their pain and my hope is that their pain will help someone else with their pain, and so on and so forth. I have learned that all of the things that happened to me have the opportunity to work for the good of me and other people. Genesis 50:20 Joseph said to his brothers. "You intended to hurt me but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." I know that this is hard stuff to hear and to talk about. But the devil loves secrecy for that very reason. It isolates us and makes us feel like we're the only damaged one. That is a lie from the pit of hell! 

God has such a loving and compassionate heart he knows what we all have been through and he wants to heal us from all of our pain. In this life my pain may never go away completely. I know that I will remember the feeling I had when I started to heal, so I can empathise with another sister or brother of mine that has gone through the same thing. So that I can hold them tightly and tell them of how God has redeemed me and  that he will do the same for them. I actually don't want to forget. The people that have helped me the most in this trying time have been people that have also suffered pain and know how to give an encouraging hug and point me to Jesus. We will never have the ability to heal anyone in our lives, we have to realase them into the hands of Jesus;  but what we can do is what the bible instructs us to do which is "Mourn with those who mourn; rejoice with those who rejoice." Romans 12:15

I might be in pain right now but I am recovering. The one thing I won't do is give up. I heard Christine Caine say this today and I could not agree more. " The devil on his BEST day didn't take me out on MY WORST day." God has already won the fight. We need only to grasp his hand tighly and let Him help us embrace the pain of recovery. Because the devil will tell you that because you're in pain you are still not healed. NO FRIENDS! It's because we are healing that we feel pain. Praise God. 

By allowing God to help me heal the quality and amazingness of my life has doubled! I can now hold my head up high with the dignity that God provides me. I do believe that in heaven I will not experience any of this pain. And you won't either. 

 Stay blessed and stay saucy 

-Libier Reynolds 

I See YOUR Peanut

The other day I sat with my two girls and had a nice relaxing lunch.  Instead of eating on the go or standing up, I SAT DOWN (yes, Mommy you can sit down to eat from time to time). It was so very nice to sit and chat with my four year old and make annoying sounds to my one year old. I think I forget that Haylee is fully capable to understand me even when I don't talk to her like a little baby! As we sat and enjoyed our lunch I busted out my spicy peanuts that my dad gave me.  I really didn't want to share them because they are soooo yummy but that's when you know you've grown as s person and mommy. When you are willing to give your last bite or share something that you really really like with your children. Or husband or boyfriend or cat? Well nonetheless, as soon as the plastic crackled from my fingers starting to open the bag they KNEW I had something yummy.  Mind you at this point I'm still thinking I can "hide" the bag behind the cereal box and sneak them into my mouth without recognition. But NOPE.  Haylee starts nagging and signing for "more" and Maddy asks me to share with her. . So I share.  ONE peanut with Haylee first and Maddy looks at Haylee-looks at her peanut and then at me and says "momma, where's mine?" Mind you, I had already given her ONE peanut and it was RIGHT in front of her, but she was too busy looking at the sisters peanut and then complaining to me that I hadn't given her one to notice. WOW. What a teachable moment. For ME! 

I love when God disciplines me through me disciplining my children. It's quite hilarious. I understood him telling me that if I am caught up looking at someone else's peanut, I will never notice or enjoy my own. The act of coveting, comparison and complaint toward God are slipery slopes for me.  They trap me in a lie that I have not enough. I get stuck  in a paradigm of scarcity instead of one of plenty. When I am focusing on how God is blessing someone else and wishing I had that, I forget to look at the blessings right here in my life. I forget how BIG and loving God is and that he wants to bless me and has the capability to do so. But my attitude first needs to change. No matter what God gives me, if my attitude is one of ungratefulness and looking at the glass half empty, nothing he ever does for me will ever be enough. I want to re-wire my thinking. I want everyday to be a day of gratitude. I want to keep my eyes focused on my relationship with God and be grateful for what I already have. 

I hope you can focus on your peanuts with me! Together we can ALL eat our peanuts and enjoy that God has plenty for all of us. We serve a POWERFUL AND MIGHTY GOD! 

Go to LIBIERREYNOLDS.com for other ways to connect with me! Facebook, YouTube, Instagram.  

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

Love, Libier

What The Crotch!?

There are days in my life that are just perfect. Days that I feel so happy to be alive. You know that kind of joy and excitement that makes you all giddy and makes you want to pee your pants... Do you know what I'm talking about? No? Yeah, me either, I've never peed my pants or anything. Anyway! Those are days that I just want to hold on to so hard! And there are other days that I feel like nothing is going right. Somehow my children seem possessed by all kind of bad behaving demons and my face has a huge pimple that came out of nowhere, I feel bloated, somehow none of my clothes fit me. By the grace of God, I manage to get everyone in the car and feel somewhat successful  and then because I don't have clean hot beverage travel mugs  (this problem mind you, seems to only happen when I'm having an off day) my coffee spills onto my crotch. Have you had a day like this? Yeah I'm sure everyone has different circumstances but "good days" vs. "bad days" nonetheless.

I find that on that awful day there is something brewing in my heart that is trying to come out and I'm not allowing it. Somehow, if I dismiss my heart telling me that there is an issue I have to address, I end up having the "bad" day. My circumstances don't change much from day to day but my attitude and my perception of my day do. Especially if there is unresolved conflict in my inner wo(man). Paul the apostle said "I have learned the secret of being content in ANY and EVERY situation." Philippians 4:12 Now Paul wasn't saying this while enjoying a cup of joe like I get to (even if it HAS burned my crotch). He had endured so much for the sake of his faith. However, how can I make my theology become my reality through Paul's beautiful example? I take these two things from this.  

1- No matter what I am going though, if it's difficult for ME, GOD cares and He wants to help me. Nothing is too petty for God. He is compassionat and he knows why I am the way I am. He knows all the broken places and wants to heal them. Jesus has felt every kind of pain and suffering so whatever I am going through he cares and he understands. 

2- Jesus is the anchor that holds me together when everything in my life is out of control. He is the constant that provides unfailing love, mercy and grace ALL the time. It isn't based on my performance. Thank God! 

Jesus WILL see us through some of the darkest days in our lives. He is the "secret" to being content in all circumstances. 

I pray that God would help me surrender my control to him right now. And I pray that if you're reading this that you would be encouraged and that you would allow God to show you that he is trustworthy. Nothing is too small or too big for God. 

Stay blessed and stay saucy!  

-Libier 

The Bright Orange Cones

There is a HUGE project  by my house for restructuring a massive street that has freeways connecting on a highly trafficked street in my home town. It has been annoying and awesome watching these Cal transit peeps work on it for the last year or so. At first, it didn't seem like they were getting much done. Then came all the demolition and reworking the streets, Lots of noise with all the digging up through concrete and such. Lanes had to be blocked off, sometimes some lanes were not even open. It has definitely been an adventure leaving and coming home for some time now. I never know which lanes will be open. I can't just be on auto pilot, you know. Which by the way one time I totally drove all the way to my HIGH SCHOOL after a couple of years of graduating, so yeah,you can very much be on auto pilot. It seems like they have to be more in the completion stages of the thing and I have grown used to the way things are now, until today!

They are working on this little loopty-woo (yep that's a word) that takes you from the big scary street to the small residential street and it loops around. Well I was on auto pilot, praying, mind you and all of the sudden all I see are these bright orange cones starting to line up a very different lane than I'm used to. I got a little nervy and grasped at the wheel a little tighter and asked God to help me not panic. I made it through just fine but was a little startled (not much compared to the way I would've been like before. I used to have terrible driving anxiety. This time my palms didn't even sweat!). It was funny that I was just praying that God would lead me in my life. I was asking him to not  let me "drive far off from Him" at that moment. And with that image I had an epiphany that HE WILL AND IS guiding me. He has been since before I knew Him and even more so now that I am asking for his help.

Just as the construction project in my neighborhood, it's taking a little time for God to do the work that he needs to do. But if you could see my heart you could see a huge construction site. Some parts still look without shape, a little ugly if you will. Some have more structure. Some things God has had to demo and tear down. However, now my detours don't seem scary. Every 'WILD' turn I allow my heavenly father to take me on I can feel him holding my hand ever so tightly. When I need redirecting he will put some bright orange cones to lead me into the right direction. I pray that you will believe God for his word is true. Psalm 119:105 He said that he will be "a lamp to my feet And a light to my path". I want to believe him. I hope you do too!

Stay blessed and stay saucy!