Taking A NEW Direction

I'll tell you something. I have had the pleasure of being sneaky and manipulative my whole life. I am being totally sacrastic right now because I dont think it's been a pleasure. It's been more like a curse and my survival mode. It comes from a very broken place. It comes from believing no one has my back and I have to either make things happen on my own or they will never get done. I haven't had the opportunity to learn  to trust ANYONE in life. So for 30 years I've been resorting to being sneaky and manipulative to sway the odds to go my way. I am in a vastly "impossible" journey right now, click HERE if you'd like to read my proposal. I am raising half a million dollars for a non-profit organization BridgetsDream.org. I am suggesting to anyone who pays for talent to hire me and pay them until we reached the half a mill. Well, I've been trying to do this since November of last year and no such "luck". I know ... I know.... that is not very much time, but in my little head it's been too long.

 Why doesn't God just coming down from his heavenly place and wave his magic wand and just giving us the half a mil? Why? Well. Although I fully believe that the impossible is POSSIBLE with God. I think his plan is better than mine. WHAT?! "How could that be impossible" In the words of my four year old. Although I belive in miracles, only becuse I've witness them myself...  I would not be alive right now typing this blog if it weren't for a miracle of God. I was in such a place of dispair last year that I literaly understand why people want to comit suicide. God got me out of that hell. He got me out of the darkest pit you could ever imagine. Without medicine.... without therapy (I am not suggesting that it isn't good to go to therapy, I think it's amazing to work things out with someone who can help you. I am also not suggesting taking medicine is bad when you need it. I just have a specific senario of why it worked out the way it did for me.) It's a miracle. Although I trust 95% that God can do it ALL, I know that he is doing something more amazing than I could ever imagine or come up with myself. Even thought I feel and know all these things I still struggle with taking matters into my own hands. By trying to manipulate cituations, people so on and so forth. I don't feel good saying it but I have to be honest about my heart and where it's at. The problem is that I don't HAVE to do that because I can take the pressure OFF myself and place the burden on HIM. He is the one who is going to help. I am only to be the hands and feet. Serving each day and being still (in my mind) and knowing that he is God. He will help. I know that. I just need to trust that he will and that I don't have to resort to sneaky and manipulating because I can fail him on a daily basis. But he, HE WILL NEVER FAIL ME. OR YOU.

With the help of some amazing friends I was able to put this journey on it's head. I am so grateful to have such amazingly talented and SMART friends. So we are going to focus our attention in a different direction for now.  I am going to ask our community for help. I am going to ask for artist in Sacramento to help me raise the money. And I am going to ask anyone who feels moved to donate to this cause to do so. I trust BridgetsDream.org I KNOW they have already helped so many people. And with the first survivor-led Drop in center in Sacramento, they will be able to help God only knows how many more. Stay tuned to what's next. If you'd like to help please let me know! 

Stay blessed and stay saucy!

-Libier